Health Care Bill Would Require People to Pay More, Get Less November 7, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
Analysis of the pending Obama Administration health care bill indicates that most taxpayers will end up paying more, yet get less medical care than they currently do under preexisting plans. This, however, is not a bad thing according to an Obama Administration spokesperson.
“An estimated 90% [...]

CBS Warned by Obama Administration October 31, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
CBS News skepticism regarding the number of jobs saved by the Obama Administration’s stimulus legislation raised ire at the White House. CBS News reporter Chip Reid aired a report revealing that many of the Administration’s claimed “job saved or created” totals were either exaggerated or [...]

Democrats Reject Cheney Criticism of Afghan Policy October 24, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
Former Vice-President Dick Chenney’s comment accusing the Obama Administration of “dithering” on the decision whether to send more troops to Afghanistan drew sharp rebukes from key Democrats.
Administration Press Secretary, Robert Gibbs dismissed Chenney’s comments as “off-base.” “Where Mr. Chenney sees dithering, the reality is that [...]

Parents’ Concern over President’s Address to Schools Called ‘Silly’ October 24, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News

Amidst widespread concern among parents that the President’s address to school children this coming week is an attempt at indoctrination, the President’s Press Secretary, Robert Gibbs, derided them as “silly.”
“The President is all about the future,” Gibbs said. “It’s imperative that he reach young minds [...]

Senate Majority Leader Rejects Tort Reform’s Cost Savings as “Insignificant” October 18, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) rejected the idea of incorporating tort reform into the health care legislation now under consideration. The issue arose when the Congressional Budget Office estimated that tort reform could reduce health care costs by $54 billion over the next decade.
“Look, [...]

Nobel Committee Explains Peace Prize Award October 10, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
To the surprise of nearly everyone, the Norwegian Nobel Committee has awarded its 2009 Peace Prize to US President Barack Obama. Committee Chairman Thorbjørn Jagland said that “a number of key factors went into our decision.”
“First, President Obama is more for peace than any other [...]

President Fails to Medal in Olympic Bid October 3, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
A stunned media was left speechless when President Barack Obama’s personal sales pitch on behalf of Chicago’s bid to host the 2016 Summer Games failed to sway the International Olympic Committee (IOC). Of the four contending bids, Chicago’s was the first to be rejected—giving it [...]

Senator Defends Plan to Jail Uninsured September 26, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
Architect of the so-called compromise health care bill, Senator Max Baucus (D-Mont) defended a controversial provision in the legislation that would send those who refuse to pay for mandated insurance to prison.
“Look, our goal is 100% compliance,” Baucus explained. “’Carrots’ aren’t enough to motivate those [...]

ACORN Caught on Film September 20, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
The Obama Administration took another blow to its credibility when it was revealed that the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN) was caught on film advising clients on how to engage in illegal activities. In an undercover operation, conservative activists James O’Keefe and [...]

President Explains How Everyone Will Benefit from His Health Care Plan September 12, 2009

By John Semmens: Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News
President Barack Obama took to the airwaves to dispel what he called “a barrage of lies and fear thrown up by the forces of evil incarnate.” The President went on to insist that “contrary to what my enemies are saying, not a single person will [...]